Saturday, July 7, 2012

Hey! You! Sit down.. I wanna tell you something....

Hey readers... you can read this if you want, but it's actually a letter to me.
That I need to send, um.... a long time ago.
I recently discovered that my phone is sending texts from the future (honest! People get texts from me that say I sent them 6, 8 hours or even severeal days AFTER I did. So if I text you at 9:52 you will get a text from me at 9:52 that says I sent it at 7am or 3 days from now)
So... that got me thinking about time machines and time travel... and I thought it was time to tell myself all of this.
Where do I start? At what point do I say, "Hey, make this change, make this choice. Where should I draw the line that would bring me to a different path from today?" It's funny but when I sit down and think of it this way... there isn't a lot I would change for a long time. And what I thought was going to be a funny, lighthearted post really isn't.
Dear 16 year old me;
First... of all, I want you to know this is really from me, so there's a loose brick in the chimney at Gramma's house. In it, there's $20 you got from babysitting for Christine a thin red notebook that you use a diary for the really secret stuff and a picture of a wedding dress that would rival Cinderellas.
Convinced yet? Ok... so one more hint.. you used to hide cookies inside Anderson's Fairy Tales so no one knew they were there. Oh and 16 year old me? You aren't fat, you have curves. Eat a damn sandwich.

Invest in google. :)

Study. Study harder and then study some more.

You aren't going to marry Mike. You're going to marry someone from your french class, but first you're going to go to Ohio.
Ohio-well I was going to say just don't do it, but you know what? Ohio was good on a lot of levels. Go to Ohio, do all the ohio stuff, the good, the bad and then come back.

When you come back from Ohio...
You have dreams. Live them. For god sakes live them... dreams are for living.

Get married.
Have your babies they are amazing people and the world is a better place for their existence.
Oh yeah.... about that. Having babies is not going to be easy for you... and you're going to cry about that a lot, so much... and you're going to be sure you'll never have kids, and when you do, you'll feel like a failure that you couldn't have more. It's ok, your kids are amazing people and you'll be really happy that you had 2. You don't really want more than that anyway.

And here... right about here I think is where you need to rethink some things.
Do not go to Florida. Florida is a mistake of EPIC proportions.

Do not put your dreams on hold.

Keep painting and drawing and dancing in the kitchen.

It's ok to lean on people. You don't have to do it all alone.

Check credentials. Always. Yours, others, everyones.

Don't turn off the music, you need music like most people need air, and silence is very loud.
At some point in 2001 someone is going to give you a piece of paper with a website on it, don't wait years to look at it. The things that you are going to learn about yourself from that.... are astounding. You will find things from that that will bring you happiness and joy and so many gifts that I can't begin to explain right now. Just trust me.

Reality is more than you think.

You're awesome.

Your hair looks cute pink... you should do that sooner. :)

You are unconventional. That's kinda cool and it's ok to embrace that.

Read more, never stop reading.

Don't neglect your health... if something seems "off" keep pushing til you know why. Sooner is always better.

Keep sitting up straight, you'll be glad you did.

Don't be scared... You have the potential and the power to do some incredible things... don't be afraid of it.. don't be afraid to try, to fail, to regroup and then try something else.

Life is shorter than you realize.

It's ok to make changes. Just because you made promises doesn't mean that there aren't times you need to break them.

Oh wait...
Ok... I should make a promise to me.
I promise that I will take care of me. Whatever that may mean down the road.

When you're 24 you are going to want to get a tattoo. You will come REALLY close to doing it and for years you will think about doing it over and over- you'll never be sorry you didn't though. :)

See more of the US while you've got the chance... you're going to see plenty of the world.

Never forget the person that is the hardest on you is you, and that the voice you hear telling you not to do something is a liar.

Love, Me


  1. 1. I agree with the sandwich part... at 16 you would eat a piece of cheese and think you were going to get fat... I remember this CLEARLY.

    2. Agree about the babies... and I understand the pain.

    3. And that voice IS a liar... except for the time you wanted to get that tattoo. ;o)

    4. What website was on that piece of paper in 2001? I need a website...

    1. 1. I <3 cheese.
      2. I know you do. *hugs*
      3. I'm too picky to get a tattoo. I'd have spent the rest of my life mad that something about it wasn't "right" and you know it.
      4. It was one I ignored until 2009. Leave it to me to procrastinate 8 years. Your website will appear. It may have already. It wouldn't be the same as mine anyway.
      Miss you.

  2. There are somethings I would have told my younger self as well, but nothing that would really change the course of anything. I just wish I had learned sooner that I was worthy of loving myself. I'm just now figuring that out. I'm hoping I can teach my girls to love themselves. Great letter though... and I'm needing the website as well.

  3. Fabulous post Kelly...

    I'd just tell myself that my dad knew shit about who I was... That I'm awesome no matter what package I'm in...

    Thanks for being amazing.